LUCI: So, last week was my sister’s birthday and she had cake! It was the yummy kind of cake with lots of blue flowers. I tried it by myself when no one was in the kitchen. Mommy came in and yelled at me because I had blue lips. The next day, Mommy gave me a whole piece of the cake. I thought it would be fun to set it on my chair and stomp my feet in it! The cake and icing felt SO funny between my toes! I was so excited to show Mommy what I did, so I walked through the house, all the way up the stairs to show her! She didn’t seem happy! The NEXT day, I POOPED BLUE PLAYDOUGH!!! How many other toddlers can say they did THAT?!? I love it when my sister has a birthday!!

MOMMY:  Holy. Shit. The store-bought cake. NEVER again. My daughter’s friend dropped a small birthday cake off to her as a token of her love. I had no idea this cake would become the topic of conversation, let alone the prime suspect in many messes, for the following four days! It started when Luci decided to help herself to the blue iced flowers. WOW! Her face and hands stayed blue for hours! The next day, I caved and gave her a piece of cake. Then, I thought (stupidly) that I could slip away to take a quick shower and no harm would be done. Wrong. I realized my mistake as soon as I peeked out of the shower curtain when Luci came in the bathroom as said, “Mommy! Look…cake!” She. Had. Cake. Everywhere. “Luci!!! NOOOO!” After cleaning up the mess, I STILL left the remaining cake on the counter. (I’m asking myself now why I didn’t just throw it all away!) Day 3 arrived, and Luci pooped her pants. When she announced what had just happened, I was shocked to see what was actually in her underwear! I kid you not, it looked like someone sculpted a bright blue submarine out of playdough! Gross!!! Day 4 can only be explained by saying that anyone in our house that ate cake didn’t have a normal color of bowel movement, and they thought it was their duty to share it with me. Morale to our little story is: 1. NEVER trust a toddler for even a FIVE minute shower! 2. NEVER trust a toddler with cake. 3. NEVER trust a store-bought, chemical-ridden, dye-drenched cake ever, ever, ever, again! Happy Birthday, Ellie! 😉


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